A young man comes across an old man sitting on a park bench, crying.
When he asks him why, the old man replies, "I have a beautiful, 27-year-old wife waiting for me at home."
Of course the young man is confused.
He asks, "Why are you crying because you have a beautiful, 27-year-old wife waiting for you at home?"
The old man looks up and cries out, "I can't remember where I live!"
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I'M SURE YOU HAD A GOOD LAUGH.
No doubt you've shaken off stress, you feel better now I guess?
Laughter works like medicine makesure you don't allow anything tamper with your joy this year.
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Young And Old...
A young punker gets on the cross-town bus. He's got spiked, multicolored hair that's green, purple, and orange. His clothes are a tattered mix of leather rags. His legs are bare and he's without shoes. His entire face and body are riddled with pierced jewelry and his earrings are big, bright feathers. He sits down in the only vacant seat, directly across from an old man who just glares at him for the next ten miles.
Finally, the punk gets self conscious and barks at the old man, "What are you looking at you old fart? Didn't you ever do anything wild when you were young?"
Without missing a beat, the old man replies, "Yeah. Back when I was young and in the Navy, I got really drunk one night in Singapore and had sex with a parrot. I thought maybe you were my son."
Finally, the punk gets self conscious and barks at the old man, "What are you looking at you old fart? Didn't you ever do anything wild when you were young?"
Without missing a beat, the old man replies, "Yeah. Back when I was young and in the Navy, I got really drunk one night in Singapore and had sex with a parrot. I thought maybe you were my son."
Blonde Painter.
A blonde worker was given the job of painting white lines down the middle of the highway. On her first day, she painted six miles. On her second day, she painted three miles. On her third day, she painted less than a mile.
The foreman was not pleased. "How come you're doing less each day?" he demanded.
The blonde replied, "Each day I keep getting further away from the can of paint!"
The foreman was not pleased. "How come you're doing less each day?" he demanded.
The blonde replied, "Each day I keep getting further away from the can of paint!"
Married Virgin
Ever heard about the woman who married three different Microsoft employees and still died a virgin?
Her fist husband was in Training, and he kept teaching her how to do it herself. The second one was in Sales, and he kept telling her how good it was going to be in the next release. The third was in Tech Support, and he kept saying, "Don't worry, it'll be up any minute now..."
Her fist husband was in Training, and he kept teaching her how to do it herself. The second one was in Sales, and he kept telling her how good it was going to be in the next release. The third was in Tech Support, and he kept saying, "Don't worry, it'll be up any minute now..."
Funny Old Man
Funny Old Man - The best bloopers are here
Hope you had a good laugh?
Please check this blog again for more.
Red Alert!
The admiral was resting in his quarters when suddenly the lookout burst in. "Two enemy ships spotted on the horizon, sir."
"Right," said the admiral, "Fetch me my red shirt."
The danger passed but later in the day the lookout burst in once more. "Three enemy ships spotted on the horizon, sir."
"Right," said the admiral, leaping to his feet. "Fetch me my red shirt."
Again the danger passed but the lookout felt compelled to ask the admiral why he always ordered his red shirt when the threat of battle arose.
"Well," explained the admiral. "It's a question of moale. If I'm wounded while wearing a red shirt, the men won't see the blood and will continue to fight."
When this answer was relayed to the rest of the crew, all agreed that their admiral was a remarkably courageous man.
The next morning, the admiral was resting in his quarters as usual when suddenly the lookout burst in. "Twelve enemy ships are closing in fast, sir!"
"Right," said the admiral. "Fetch me my brown pants."
"Right," said the admiral, "Fetch me my red shirt."
The danger passed but later in the day the lookout burst in once more. "Three enemy ships spotted on the horizon, sir."
"Right," said the admiral, leaping to his feet. "Fetch me my red shirt."
Again the danger passed but the lookout felt compelled to ask the admiral why he always ordered his red shirt when the threat of battle arose.
"Well," explained the admiral. "It's a question of moale. If I'm wounded while wearing a red shirt, the men won't see the blood and will continue to fight."
When this answer was relayed to the rest of the crew, all agreed that their admiral was a remarkably courageous man.
The next morning, the admiral was resting in his quarters as usual when suddenly the lookout burst in. "Twelve enemy ships are closing in fast, sir!"
"Right," said the admiral. "Fetch me my brown pants."
Simply Hiking!
A father came home from a long business trip to find his son riding a fancy new bike.
"Where did you get the money for that?" he asked. "It must've cost $300!"
"I earned it hiking," replied the boy.
"Come on, son, tell me the truth. Nobody gets that sort of money by hiking. Where did you really get the cash?"
"It's like I say, Dad. Every night you were gone, Mr. Jones from the bank would come over and see Mom. He'd give me a 20-dollar bill and tell me to take a hike."
"Where did you get the money for that?" he asked. "It must've cost $300!"
"I earned it hiking," replied the boy.
"Come on, son, tell me the truth. Nobody gets that sort of money by hiking. Where did you really get the cash?"
"It's like I say, Dad. Every night you were gone, Mr. Jones from the bank would come over and see Mom. He'd give me a 20-dollar bill and tell me to take a hike."
Sexy Old Man!
Funny Sexy Old Man - Click here for more home videos
I really hope this puts a lovely smile on your face.
Have a wonderful 2009 and a lovley day!
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